Thursday, February 01, 2007

Round 1

So I woke up this morning battling with demons and their mothers, flames that won’t die down, pirate-type iron weights that drag you down to the ocean bed; and walls.

We continued with the battle [it crept up on me stealthily in my car] after breakfast. When I was alone. Battles are respectful creatures, they will engage with you only when the family is out of the way. When you’re on your own. Alone.

It got messy. I’ll admit. Very messy. We had an epic Bollywood song on the radio for effect too [several] which doesn’t help really. It makes things murkier. So, amidst the Ashram flyover traffic, we raged on, it and I, splashing tears all over the windscreen, blurring out pesky, intrusive [hello babeh wanna ride together-together] motorcyclists and motorists, ignoring traffic lights, wrestling for control over my head.

Luckily, earlier this morning I had taken a wily precautionary measure.


Camouflage.

Red black pungent purple acid green and silver. Today I am a confused rainbow. Tomorrow I might be a white and blue cloud.

But I’m not sure it’s worked. Yet. Can’t say. I’m anticipating another round on my way back home. I think I'll paste on some red lipstick. For reinforcement.



20 comments:

houseband00 said...

A nice woodland camouflage would be nifty but since you're in delhi, digital urban jungle would be perfect. If all fails, carnation will do. =)

houseband00 said...

No, no, marigold, I meant. =)

H said...

Good idea. Marigold it is. I think my orange pyjamas are sleeping with moth balls right now [shameless loose pyjamas]. But. Marigold is my favourite. La la la.

Arcane Crapper said...

Are you 'Special Forces'? :D

PS: I'll post only when I have something to write about.

Again, PS: And more? You wanted to know 'bout that? Well, let's say I know someone who's bashed up autodrivers and fought bitterly with Cafe Coffee Day waiters. :)

H said...

I could be 'Special Forces'; depending on my mood. Anyway, today's cloud day.

Arcane Crapper said...

What's cloud day? I thought were only three types of days - Bad day, Normal day and Good day.

Of course the third can also be a biscuit.

So, what REALLY is cloud day? My curiosity has been piqued.

NanNan said...

I saw you in the clouds today--but that's not unusual--- I've seen you in rainbows too---- but mostly in ruby sunsets-------whatever your disguise,, I love you!!!

H said...

AC: it's camouflage parlance. translates to: billowing white cloudy pants & skinny blue top with sequins for a tasteful silver lining.

Biscuit is very Parle-G. Camp. We'd rather a nice chocolate truffle.

Nan, you've just made me break my resolution yet again. I wasn't going to tear up today. And. You've made my day in the best possible way. HUG. I love you too.

H said...

The word 'camp' is absolutely inappropriate here. But I was dying to use it. I even tried using it in a concept note for a film. But It didn't work there either. SO I said, what the heck, I'll use it on my own blog. it's like farting in your own space right?

whatever. :-(

[don't know why i felt compelled to explain. at length].

go(ld)phish said...

alo h, wheneva u need re-inforcements, you know who to call eh?

go(ld)phish said...

i think i spelt re-enforcements wrong. pls let that not mean anything.

nunu's mum said...

Just a postscript to the previous post: Me thinks u should make yourself known to your objet/bloggie d'affection, just my humble possibly useless opinion...


Hahahahahahaha.... [hello babeh wanna ride together-together] why am I not in India? For some reason, I'm under the impression you're in Delhi? CMIIW (correct me if i'm wrong)

You're absolutely right, they cower at the sight of family, they don't totally disappear, they're just lurking in the shadows and come out in full force when you're alone.

But whatever your colour for the day is, be it pungent purple, acid green or manuric brown, don't forget to accessorize babes!

That's it girl, slap on that she-devil red lipstick. That's all the reinforcement you need.

I just luuuurve your wit, makes a nice accompaniment to my otherwise blah blah earl grey tea in the morning!

*mwaaahh* ~sorry there's a lipstick smear on your cheek~

nunu's mum said...

yup, it's Delhi. Read HB's comment. =)

cheer up princess! have a smashing week-end!

H said...

Oye Phish. first you come and have an Earl Grey with me [and M, we’ll make it a threesome at your place – very delighted to learn that EG’s your chai too!]. But getting back to Go(ld)phish – dear phish, all the reinforcement/ re-inforcement/ re-enforcement – thrice reinforced is very very … re-assuring [not to be mistaken with the pallid-ness of reassuring]. Thankeeeyooo :-)

MMMMMMMM: My bloggie d'affection has politely thanked me for being a ‘keen and avid reader’ [with a garlic-garland and silver cross thrown in], in response to comments that thinly mask my absolute and undying [shamelessly salivating] adulation. Kinda puts you in your place, doesn’t it? I’m just a farkin’ lowly fan. That’s all. [I was thinking more on the lines of marriage-proposal-by-email or something] Sigh. I’ll get over it. Eventually.

But. Yes, why are you not in India? You did take my invitation seriously, didn’t you? Delhi is a wonderful place for joyrides. As you will discover.

OoOOoooH accessories!!! I’ll take all my accessorising tips from you, Diva of Barnsley. :-D

pRicky said...

ahem!!!
it aint over till its over...
but going into a second round with lipstick, isnt that going a little too far ;-)
AC forgot to mention FU day...
thats how most of my days are so i would know...
you were in what set of wheels?
now that has got my interest piqued

H said...

Pricky, lipstick? are you kidding me? I even wear kohl [Zorro-like] and an extra dab of 'white musk too'. Nothing's ever far out enough in psychological warfare. this is serious business bwoy!

And what be FU day?

Set of wheels? I drive a gorgeous old 800. White. peeling paint. She's gorgeous not because she's an 800. she just is gorgeous. even if she was a merc she'd be gorgeous. [somehow that sounded a little wrong]. But you do get. right?

Arcane Crapper said...

Nu post, medem?

pRicky said...

fucked up day
ya i know what u mean...
cars bikes cycles skates... sexy all

Lizza said...

The dragon strikes most powerfully when you're alone.

I'm sorry it's giving you such a fucking hard time. But...I'm a teensy-weensy bit glad, too, truth be told. Because you come up with such great posts (I abhor the word great almost as much as I do nice, but can't stop using them). Posts that make my jaw drop to the floor.

H said...

BTW, since we're on the topic of chinese horoscopes, I'm a dragon. HAAAAAH [yikes, just scorched the screen].

Nice and great Are GREAT words. And since we have mutual admiration society going full swing, I think we'll both need jaw binders ;-) hugs. once again, super glad you're back!