Friday, February 16, 2007

Pink teeth

Last night I had a dream about my journalism teacher from way back during post-grad – a sort-of-attractive [if pink teeth and grey gums qualify], hyperactive lunatic who’d tear up our assignments dramatically with predictable regularity and call us [a class of 40 women] ‘kutreya’ [marathi for ‘dogs’] affectionately. For some reason he also had this particularly unattractive habit of lying to us about everything he could lie about from his mother [who he once claimed was a skanky, evil-tempered, penniless Goan fisherwoman] to his house in Goa [which he claimed was an elegant bungalow on a street named after his maternal grandfather] to his still-undetermined sexuality – all of which, strangely enough, gave him this exciting edge in our collective imagination. Which, when given a bit of thought to, is ridiculous because it isn’t often that one expresses in one’s wish list for the Ideal Man a lying, pink-toothed, grey-gummed, vile-tempered mouthy monster.

Anyhow, so in the dream he read my blog, sneered at me and promptly jumped into my cupboard in my nice-clothes section, stuck his thumb in his mouth, curled up amidst my nice clothes and went off to sleep. With his glasses on.

And then, I couldn’t get him out.

While I didn’t really mind it [because my nice clothes aren’t all that terribly nice and my cupboard’s in a perennial mess] it just sort of seemed embarrassing, because all the magazines and newspapers he writes for were looking for him as were thronging hordes of women [ex and present students], and, here’s the frustrating part – I wasn’t allowed to tell them where he was.

I couldn’t quite get a handle on this dream. So I thought I’d offer it up here, for deconstruction[s].

Oh and, don’t ask relevant questions like:
1.) Why did they [newspapers, magazines, students (ex and present)] come to you, if they didn’t know where he was?
2.) How’d he know about your blog? In fact why was he even interested in it?
3.) Etc.

17 comments:

houseband00 said...

H is for hilarious! =)

H said...

But HBeeeeeeeeee, you haven't helped me figure what all this means!

lizza said...

Hahahaha! And I thought my dreams were weird!

Very very interesting dream, H. Let me consult the oracle, and I'll get back to you. ;-)

pRicky said...

we could deconstruct this freudian way...
if you would like dear H
but i quite like the post without deconstructing it in my head...
but i cant help not deconstructing it...
but i cant possibly write what i deconstruct it to be... paradox of deconstructing dreams with men who are teachers with pink teeth...
i do wanna know how his teeth got pink???

H said...

Lizza: Hahahahaha. Can't wait to hear about some of them. And also... can't wait to hear what the oracle has to say!

Pricky: Bwoy, if you have something to say about it, I want to hear it [please admire this absolutely gorgeous teacher-tone!]
About JP's pink teeth, ~shudder~ I don't even want to think about them, let alone spend any part of my brain on why they are the way they are.

B Ditty said...

I think it means...42.

Which coincidentally is the answer to life, the universe and everything.

Or my other theory: you want a baby? lol

Lizza said...

Okay, this is going to be lengthy. The Oracle (aka Google) led me to dreammoods.com, which yielded the following answers:

Teacher: To see your teacher (past or present) in your dream, suggests that you are seeking some advice, guidance, or knowledge. You are heading into a new path in life and ready to learn by example or from a past experience. Consider your own personal experiences with that particular teacher. What subject was taught? Alternatively, it may relate to issues with authority and seeking approval. You may be going through a situation in your waking life where you feel that you are being treated like a student or in which you feel you are being put to a test.

Journal (well, a blog's an online journal to some, right?): To dream that someone is reading your journal, indicates that you are keeping secrets. You have difficulties telling others how you really feel.

Pink (as in pink teeth): Pink represents love, joy, sweetness, happiness, affection, kindness. Being in love or healing through love is also implied with this color.

Alternatively, there's hot pink (you didn't specify!): The appearance of hot pink color in your dream, represents sex and lust. (hahahahahaa!)

Silence (your inability to tell the women where the teacher was hiding): To dream that you are silent, indicates an inability to express yourself. You may feel inhibited in voicing your opinion and how you really feel.

Cupboard: To dream that you are opening a cupboard, signifies that you are revealing some hidden truth or secret.

Cabinet: To see a cabinet in your dream, symbolizes the female body and/or the womb. Alternatively, you may be hiding some family or personal secret. Consider the contents and condition of the cabinet for more clues.

To dream that someone rearranged your cabinets, suggests that somebody is overstepping your boundaries.

Clothes: To dream of your clothes, is symbolic of your public self and how you are perceived. It is indicative of the act you put on in front of others. Clothes is also an indication of your condition and status in life.

Well, I'm still confused. ;-)

H said...

Dr. Ben Freuditty: so you've been hiking across the universe eh? Deep. plain deep.
Baby? maaayyyybe... but NOT a pink toothed, grey gummed, lunatic baby. Grin. Though if she/ he writes well... mummy doesn't mind then. :-)

Lizzzaaa! WOW! speechless. that's a very very interesting deconstruction... and I can very honestly say that several bits of it are rather true. WOW. thank you sis - for the time and effort! am ... awed.

But. just to clarify, the pink was NOT hot. it was a gross gummy pink. the kind of pink that emerges when strawberry icecream melts and runs off the cone onto dirty grubby hands and then races down to one's elbows... it's the colour of the drop that pauses a moment at the tip of the elbow before falling. [I know this colour so intimately because when I was little I only always ever ate strawberry icecream]

Pinay in Barnsley said...

Effin hell H, this post of yours made me giggle like Woody Allen only could. In fact, there's a lot of Woody Allen in this Freudian post of yours.

Pink toothed, grey gummed lunatic baby....hahahahahahahaha!!! Well, you might get away with the pink toothed/grey gummed bit but any baby of H is bound to have a smattering of lunacy (and I mean that in the most endearing way)

Uhmmm...sorry I can't help you with decoding, I've already got my hands/head full with my own twisted dreams. (OK, last night I dreamt that a blogger buddy - someone I have never ever met before - decided she was gonna cheat on her hubby and whilst she was at it, I warned her that she shouldn't use her furla bag.......................

So you wanna help me decode that one?

And that's one of the 'lighter' ones...

H said...

Ahhh. Woody Crank Allen. Sigh. I do realise that Baby isn’t going to be a paragon of normalcy. Much as I try, no baby of mine is ever going to be completely centred, unless daddy’s a saint. Daddy almost was a saint, but then seeing as he did that mummy’s so ‘not with it’ [the saintliness, and saneliness] he copped out on mummy. Aahhh. How my children-to-be suffer for my sins.

But that’s ‘nuff about me and my many non-children.

About you, lovely Pinay, cme ‘ere an sippa cuppa earl grey with me. I think that dream is sort of suggestive of a fear of floodgates bursting… Of knowing something deep in your head about a need you’re not quite ready to address… tha’ you need to stop givin’ your neighbour’s dog beans for lunch. He’s pervertin’ the air, if you know wha’ I mean. Now, tha’ll be three silver pieces, love, acroos me ole palms.

oh, an' PS love, wotsa furla bag?

NanNan said...

Yeah,,, I really want to know what a furla bag is,,, not that i'm planning to cheat on my hubby,, no one would have me anyway--- not that i would want anyone to want to have me,,,

H said...

Grin. Now now, you being very nawty Nan. I believe you’re tempting the devil here. Hahahahahaaa. Poor Frank. But yeah, M, WHAT IS A FURLA BAG!???

Anonymous said...

Tickled Silly Pink, after this read...

I finally have access to your Blog, now that I am sitting in Chilly Poland, but will be back to the land of Blog Censor before you get a chance to read this.....

Luv Sid & Nino

H said...

Siiiiiiiiiiiid! Kung Hei Fat Choi to you and little Nino.

Anonymous said...

heyyyyyyy!! I can access your blog again in China...... yippeeeeeeeeee

H said...

yeeeeeeeeehaaaaaaaaw!

derrin' do said...

my analysis involves crystal-ball gazing: it means you're gonna meet him soon. maybe like mid-may? :P