Thursday, October 26, 2006

[Not] weird

I love the word ‘weird’. [Especially since I’ve just (re)learned to spell it correctly.]

And.

I feel privileged that my friends tag me.

Because it shows how they’d like my [evidently indispensable] opinion on several things apart from and in addition to those that I already eruct in these parts. Honestly. I feel like Grace Kelly being tippity tappity tap-dance-tagged by Fred Astaires up on stage. Like a real star.

But.

Getting down to actually completing a tag task, increasingly I find is beyond my capacity to…

To what?

Self-indulge?

Let’s face it. Most tags are tailored like goodwill group-therapy exercises. They force you to think of things-about-yourself that haven’t already occurred to you a million times since you started your blog. [Or else you’d have written about it already, right?] They make you delve into those inconsequential parts of your personality that didn’t even engage your own interest. [Or else you’d have blogged about it already, right?]

This tag is from my dear [and slightly-annoyed-with-me-now] friend HB. He wants me to spill on nine reasons why I’m weird.

Weird?

But I’m not weird.

I’m normal. As normal as normal gets. The average-est person that could exist. Falling directly and squarely at the centre of all means. Statistically speaking of course. [I’m not mean like that. Just averagely mean – like anybody else I pinch helpless babies, make grown men cry, swerve my car within inches past old people on roads, torture little animals, get arsey about completing tag tasks and instead of just shutting the hell up and letting my 'tagee' friends believe I'm lazy, I write nasty posts about the tag etc… basically nothing out of the ordinary that comes even remotely close to the extreme recesses of ‘weird’].

When I first heard of this tag, I thought gleefully. Ah. Fun. This should be interesting. But then as I thought about it more and more, it dawned on me – isn’t trying to define one’s weirdness a form of extreme self-adulation?

As in: Oh look! I’m so weird. And that makes me different. Which means I’m so special!

It’s that particular, irritating italicised kind of highlight – like exclamation marks in excess, or that thing people do with a smirk while speaking with their fingers to say ‘quote unquote’. [I just did it].

So, here’s something to ponder over:

1.) We’re all struggling really really hard to fit in.

2.) We’re all depressive at time.

3.) We’re all twisted.

4.) We’ve all felt (at least at one point in our lives) that we were adopted or/ and the only secret alien life-form-designed-in-emulation-of-humans left behind on Earth by the Tralfamadorians.

5.) We’ve all got moments that are devastatingly sad.

6.) We’ve all laughed at seriously non-funny non-jokes (for days sometimes).

7.) We’ve all got quirks, talents and non-talents.

8.) We’re all clueless about why we’re here and why we wake up every morning.

9.) And ALL of us do stupid things so we can tell ourselves each morning just how our life is so much more seriously purposeful than the next person’s, while we believe just the opposite.

And that’s just plain old bloody boring-as-it-gets normal.

There. I said it. Nine reasons why I’m [not] weird.

23 comments:

Anonymous said...

Thanks for playing, H. =)

H said...

But HBeeeeeeeeeee. I didn't. I didn't play along. Stop being so nice. "thank you" indeed.

You're supposed to retort with a sharp, caustic pert little rejoinder that will put-'er-in-'er-place-for-being-a-sour-ole-spoil-sport.

You do realise you're swinging the mean balance in my statistical averageness and making me out to be a definite right-winger. gak.

Anonymous said...

I think you just redeemed yourself in #9.

Weirdo.

=)

H said...

thank the lord! he spoke! I never thought I'd thank someone for calling me a weirdo. Then again, if he's the one who taught me how to spell weird correctly, again, I would.

hmm.

B diddy said...

ya know it's no better to be weird than it is to be normal. it's best to just be you. cuz we love you! :)

Anonymous said...

Now that was a rant in true H-style. Trust you to turn something on its head. But you ARE weird. Okay, okay, you're not, if you say so (but you are).

That's why me heart you so much.

H said...

B Diddy, Likewise bwoy!

Lizzaaaaa... :-) how well ya know me. grin. me heart you too.

zap said...

-applause-

NanNan said...

averagely mean-- no, no, no,--never average, never mean, no my friend, you are statistically the mode !!!!

H said...

Zap; lord and master [two-headed and all] we bow down and curtsy prettily.

Nanstah: Awww. Hugs.

Kiyotoe said...

Wow. Found your spot through Lizza's place. Very interesting list. If you don't like weird, how 'bout "eccentric"?

But I have to agree on most of your points.

Anonymous said...

We're all wonderfully weird in our own way, aren't we? Enjoyed your list. I got tagged the same meme, too! c",)

winding_faith said...

madmousaile.. (or whatever the spelling is)...tagged or untagged how does it matter but i must say i love those listing of number 9's ....I was so connected ;)

H said...

Kiyotoe: yeah well incidentally weird, eccentric, strange, barmy... umm. they've ALL been used on me. And not in the oh-she's-so-cute-and-cool but more like boy-does-she-have-some-scary-renegade-nuts-in-her-head. Damn. And they wonder why she's so defensive about being tagged about nine weird things.
Sigh.

Irene: [Still sighing] I'm not sure about 'wonderfully' weird. But yes we're all weird. true true. But honestly I've enjoyed all your lists. All of them. they sound so familiar. grin.

WF: Ahaaaa. connected. hmmm. wonder WHY... HA HAHAHAHAHAHA.

n.g. said...

wierd is what wierd does. or something. koi sharaab pilao mujhe.

H said...

NG tu itna wise kaise hai yaaaar? Waise ek baat hai, Dilli mein sharab sasti milti hai. mein thak gai hoon bol bol ke. ab now don't talk to me till you're in these parts. creep.

H said...

Aur yahan Shout pe sharab nahin milti... yahan earl grey chai milega -- bagair doodh and cheeni.

zap said...

knock knock
who's there?
H
H who?
Gesundheit.

OR

knock knock
who's there?
H
H who?
Eh? No one is here you idiot. Its just the voices in your head


Hiya there! Whazzup? Nothing to say??

H said...

Zapstah. it's brewing. :-)

Anonymous said...

I miss your posts. :-(

Anonymous said...

Me, too.

Hep to it, grrl!

=)

It's like what they say: Once you go blog...

NanNan said...

She teaches us patience, anticipation, and the thrill of the next reveal---but,,,ooooooh, I'm not a quick learner-------

H said...

girls and boys... I'll be back.

[Just having a rather painful episode of cerebral constipation.]