Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Contempt that bred familiarity

Clichés and I, we exist together peaceably these days.

In fact the friendship, I am not displeased to report, has far exceeded this mild temper. Clichés and I have become Fast Friends.

Of late, I find we’ve been rescuing each other from many daunting situations.

Often these days when I falter in thought and speech [it is Age, I’m convinced. Wily bastard has been preying upon my faculties]… pronto, a cliché presents itself without consideration for its well being or reputation.

And I, on my part, renowned enemy of the cliché in my more agile days, am now but a mellow creature, who welcomes, nay defends the cliché with the magnanimity of a lactating cow. There is, undeniably, certain joy of the spirit in representing those less fortunate than oneself, and I am pleased to share my late [but Ever Timely] discovery that though the cliché can assault the finer sensibilities of those who fancy themselves a part of that remote league of linguistic militia that pit their wits against what they arrogantly refer to as the corruption of the Word [I was once one of them], there is an inextinguishable truth burning fierce and pure at the core of each of these much misunderstood foot soldiers of language.

After all, what has a cliché done, but repeat an incorruptible truth relentlessly over the ages, across language, caste, creed and sex, without fatigue, or thanks or even an honourable mention?

No more shall I indulge in this vile act of arrogance and ignorance! In fact, solemnly have I pledged that at every crossroad whence a cliché is challenged, I shall rise, without fear to wreak vengeance upon those who try to shame it with Scathing Retort and Quick Repartee. And clichés, gentle generous angels, in turn pour themselves forth with heartening abandon into every sentence I construct. They apply their sturdy time-tested selves with loving attention to every thought that I think, and together with a camaraderie befitting twins, we endeavour to erect linguistic monuments of engaging proportion.

Of course not everyone appreciates such fond memories that clichés and I are creating for posterity.

Certain dark forces are streaming forth their untrammelled maliciousness in the garb of “concern over my sudden lack of creativity” and other such thinly masked pretences at sympathy from the inner circles of Those Who I Work For, and Those Who Used To Like Reading What I Wrote in a deplorable and dastardly attempt to Put a Spanner in the Works.

If only I could tell them: Live and Let Live. But to their insensate ears, this is just another cliché. Ah irony! Such is the nifty wisdom of a handy cliché. Who but they stand by me in this Dark Hour? Is it not true that A Friend in Need is a Friend indeed? Oh clichés! Upon My Soul, you are the truest of the True Blue.

And now, gentlefolk of BlogWorld, I extend my plea to all of you who empathise with this cause – please pause a moment to sign this petition*:

Save the cliché.

Because, Without Them We Are Nothing But Shells of Ourselves.

If you forward this to ten people, a Click in Time Will Save Nine.
If you forward this to twenty people, you will Make Hay While the Sun Shines.

If you don't, Go Die in a Ditch, B… Witch.


*Disclaimer: We, at Shout, cannot promise that anything will come of this petition despite our Best Intentions, as There is Many a Slip Between the Cup and The Lip.



17 comments:

Arcane Crapper said...

Hmmmmmm. In trying to stay clichéd, you have expressed originality. Paradox or duality? :P

B Ditty said...

wow that was so poetic *tear*

H said...

AC: Both I'd say ;-)

Ben: Cliches move me.

Nunu's mum said...

Even a broken watch is correct twice a day.


THAT was the first cliche that entered my vacuous brain...honest!!!

Live off the fat of the land!!!

lizza said...

The cliché and I are on intimate terms. I am glad you're smoking the peace pipe with it. Welcome to the fold.

H said...

M: this is the first time I've heard this one. Are you sure it's a cliche at all? And if it is, I can only exclaim with joy! thank you!

Liz: I have yet to verify the veracity of your claim... however, since this brings us closer than we already are in our common pursuit, I shall not challange you to duel for making a false claim.

pRicky said...

Everytime someone said this is such a cliche or that is such a cliche i wondered what isnt?
I still feel like laughing when people say that something isnt cliche...
we might not know it or acknowledge but it usually is cliche...
i don mind...
cliche is a evergreen fashion i suppose...

pRicky said...

oh and if u go to my blog and click on tagged in the side bar I have implicated you to something...
I am looking forward to the result...
:D
*evil yet innocent sneer*

Lizza said...

You nut.

You don't need an invitation to come visit me, HB, and NM (when she comes home). You're family (soul-wise anyway). So stop sulking and get that tush over here, although I must admit the image of you pouting is adorable.

houseband00 said...

I second what Liz said.

Haul yer ass over! =)

n.g. said...

this is as worthwhile and honourable as the 'save the bawa' campaign i did in my first year of advertising. it was, albeit, restricted to our office but we did earn 5000 rupees which were well spent on dubios and nefarious consumptions. we also earned the wrath of all the parsis in the office.

H said...

Pricky: perfectly said! And now let us institute a simile [close cousin of the cliché] : as evergreen as a cliché [ah delightment!]

Pricky [again]: aw damn. And I’m the worst flaming tagee ever [unless of course, like Prom, you’re bestowing me with a thinking award] I just so absolutely and completely am unable when it comes to tags. But since it’s you who’s tagged me… I’m quite torn about doing it. Let’s see, will come up with a solution to this one, soon. And. Stop sneering. It is completely inappropriate. ;-)

Lizza: :-D the pout is all gone. My considerable tush will make its way to the Philippines… soon someday. Inshallah.

HBeeeeee: thankee… the arse [with ass] is planning to haul itself over, soon. Grin.

NG: your show of solidarity has moved me, young man. ‘Save the Bawa’ is indeed [almost] as honourable. Did I ever tell you that many many many people in Bombay thought I was a bawi girl? The sullen WIT lady actually chattered with me for a whole two minutes in bawa talk. Sigh. Many many Bawas are rather hot. ;-)

pRicky said...

you are the fundastic!!!
now get ur ass there soon...
loads awaiting your consideratyion so be extremely observant...

H said...

~shudder~ language, pricky boy. language!

pRicky said...

the most sincere of apologies everfound in the vast corners of this universe and the bathrooms of nymphs...
I present to u!!!

Prometheus said...

Well written, O Scatologically Aerodynamic Magnanimous Lactating Cow.

The road to your good intentions is paved with people who live in glass houses and all the tea in China.

H said...

thankee Lord and Mastah. your words of praise are like fat on a piggy's posterior.